Red Flags

I read an article about how virgo’s handle breakups yesterday, it said: “you look for some Greater Meaning in everything – methodically analyzing every move trying to learn from it. You vacillate between crying your eyes out or thanking your lucky stars the universe hath delivered you from this fuck boy. You continue to go through old message history looking for red flags after the fact, convinced if you could only find the turning point it would bring you some closure.”

So that’s what I decided to do. I scrolled back to the beginning, to January 27th, in hopes of gaining some closure, to finally find the answers to the questions I had been asking myself periodically since things ended.

Really, I think I just wanted to see what everyone else had told me, that he wasn’t as good as I thought for a long time. That the distance had started forming before I was able to see it myself, because I was so busy making excuses that I didn’t see what was happening right in front of me.

So I scrolled for what felt like forever and began to indulge myself in the history of our digital relationship. On February 12th he quoted a lyric from a jazz song he liked and it went “I fall in love, too easily. I fall in love, too fast. I fall in love, too terribly hard, for love to ever last”. I didn’t know it then, but that summed us up perfectly. We happened too fast and too terribly hard for anything to ever last.

I hadn’t even got to the part of our conversation where we were anything but friends before I was drained and frankly bored, so I decided to turn in for the night. I told myself I’d come back to it in the morning, finish my detective work then. But I woke up with a nasty swirling pit in my stomach and a general feeling of unease. I looked at our conversation and just felt utterly exhausted. Before embarrassingly accidentally sending something in our conversation, I finally took his advice. I deleted our conversation and I blocked him. And now we can both go on living like the other person doesn’t exist.

I was searching for some profound reason that all of this happened. That someone who I thought was so wonderful could have deceived me and how I allowed myself to be such an idiot and fall for it. The thing is, I could say that the reason all of this happened is to teach me to not be so vulnerable and naive. Or it could not even be about me. He mentioned how his views on marriage changed for the better through talking to me, so maybe the reason he came into my life had nothing to do with me – but more to do with how he’ll change for the next, or final girl in his life. Or maybe there is no reason at all.

Sometimes I think you need to let your heart reach it’s full capacity of hurting until it’s ever going to get better. Maybe it’s torture, I mean it’s certainly not healthy. Maybe it’s a virgo thing, or maybe it’s just a Kate thing. But that’s what I told myself when I started this scavenger hunt for the clues of how everything went sour. But somewhere between last night and this afternoon I realized I don’t need to know. Maybe it was him, maybe it was me, or maybe it was just us together.

I heard a quote on a television show once and it said: “You know, it’s funny; when you look at someone through rose-coloured glasses, all the red flags just look like flags”.

So this is me. Taking off my rose-coloured glasses, ignoring the trail of firmly planted red flags behind me, and finally admitting that maybe neither of us did anything wrong, we just happened too fast, and too hard, for love to ever last.

Green Apple Candle

I mentioned once in a post that I don’t usually remember what loving someone felt like because my memory fades fast. I can’t often hold onto the emotion itself, so I rely on photos and videos and writing I’d done in the past to relive moments. I depend on replaying memories in hopes of remembering how I felt at that exact point in time.

I’m having a hard time right now, because I’m beginning to forget what “loving you” felt like. I have few photos of you and the ones I do hide your face. I have no video and I’m forgetting the sound of excitement in your voice when you told stories about your family, the ocean or your plans for the future.

On one hand, I’m relieved, because you came into my world like a storm: strong, loud, and impossible to ignore. You so quickly made your home in my heart but seemingly just as fast, you decided my love wasn’t for you, and much like a storm, you vanished as rapidly as you arrived.

You left me so utterly confused. I was retracing moments, conversations, trying to figure out exactly where you made the decision to leave me. In what moment you no longer thought of my authenticity as brilliance, but emotionally draining.

There was some point in time where our compatibility and your desire to be with me trumped the work it took to maintain a relationship with someone like me. But maybe that’s just it. I was willing to comfort your moody soul and you weren’t willing to nurture my sensitive one.

Where there were once memories of countless naps in your large embrace and the smell of your green apple candle endlessly burning, there is now the memory of receiving your message telling me you’ve chosen someone else, and seeing them get on the bus at your stop moments later. There is cold text conversations and general aversion.

If it weren’t for these cyber memories I apparently can’t let go of, I would doubt that anything between us ever existed at all. But each time I return to those memories, each time I re-read an old message from you, some distance forms. It feels less like something I experienced and more like a conversation that took place between two seemingly perfect strangers.

He sent her “sometimes I feel like meeting you was my reward for everything kind I’ve ever done. I keep falling harder and faster, enjoying you more and more and you’re already so far off the scales. God bless everything that created you blank. I’m so happy to be sharing my life with you.” And she read the message and felt nothing. The butterflies asleep in her stomach, her heart maintaining a steady beat, the ducts of her eyes completely empty. And she thought: “this is what moving on feels like”.

One of the Sweetest Things I’ve Ever Received

i’m filled with hate
that i can’t hold in
yet there you are
ready to listen

i’ve been a fool
for a better part of my life
and here you are
trying to open my eyes

who needs to be sad
with so many fortunes right here
there’s no reason not to be happy
in this world of fear

life’s what you make it
or so i’ve been told
so make it the best
before we grow old

the future is far enough
so don’t think too hard
the fun we have now
will lay down the cards

you can’t pick and choose
the things life throws
so catch them
and use them
with experience we grow

thank you for this
what was once blurry is clear
i’m not sure how happy i’d be
if you weren’t here

for a pessimist
i’m looking pretty optimistic right now
it’s actually quite hard
to find my old frown

they can try to rain on this parade
but it’s been raining all along
it’s ok I brought my umbrella
i call it kate armstrong

r.b.

Little Life Update: Self Reflection

Hey,

I’ve been doing a ton of self reflection lately and I found this neat list of 50 questions to ask someone if you’d really like to get to know them, so I thought, hey, why not just answer them myself because I’m vain and I’ve had quite a few new followers lately so this can be their chance to get to know me a little bit as well. So without further a due.


1. What’s one thing that’s happened to you that has made you a stronger person?

I’ve had a really rocky relationship with one of my parents since I was a teen and I was put through a lot of really unfortunate situations as a result that were far beyond my years. I think it allowed me to mature quicker, but also realize that just because people are blood,  it doesn’t mean they’re allowed to hurt you.

2. What’s one thing that’s happened to you in your life that made you feel weak?

Honestly, nothing comes to mind. I think the toughest situations I’ve been in have only given me an excuse to better myself, so nothing really comes to mind.

3. Where is one place you feel most like yourself?

My bed, in a baggy t-shirt, with my kitty cuddled up next to me. Which is exactly what’s going on right now haha.

4. Where is your favourite place to escape to?

My home town. Which I think is kind of the opposite of how most people feel. Going home to me is always like a little holiday. I can ignore my phone, I have no where to be, I don’t have to go to school. I can just enjoy time with family and friends and be as off the grid as I’d like.

5. Who do you think has had the largest influence on the person you are today?

This may be a cheap answer, but my whole family has done such an incredible job of influencing me in the best ways. I’ve been so fortunate to grow up with a small army of powerful women. I’ve learnt to value strength and independence over lust and co-dependency and I think that’s so important.

6. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?

I would really like to be more independent. It almost feels silly to say because I live alone and I function so much on a daily basis by myself. But I find I rely on the confirmation of others while making decisions and I think having more trust in myself would be a good thing. It’s something I’m working on.

7. If you had one day left to live, what would you do first?

I would write letters to everyone that I love, eat some pho and play with my cat. That would be my whole day.

8. What decade do you feel you most belong in?

One that hasn’t happened yet. I guess if I had to choose, the 80’s. I like their music and films. Young John Cusack, hello.

9. Who are you closest to in your family? Why?

My sister, hands down. I think mainly because we are so similar, but she’s stronger than me in so many ways. She brings out the best parts of me and spending time with her is just like spending time with a real-life version of my subconscious, in the way that I feel no sense of judgement or expectations. I’m just fully my unfiltered self and I think that’s really neat.

10. Who is the one person in the world that knows you best?

Sydney. Arguably she knows me too well hahahah. I have to start so many messages to her with “this is super nasty but…”. She’s my soul mate best friend and I trust her with my life.

11. What is your favourite quality about your best friend?

That she’s wonderfully outspoken. She speaks about what she believes in and doesn’t allow anyone to walk all over her. I really admire her passion and dedication towards the issues that are important to her.

12. When you were younger what did you think you were going to be when you grew up?

A mum.

13. If you could identify with one fictional character (from a book, show, or movie) who would it be?

Tina Belcher, hands down. She’s the perfect mix of confident, awkward and down right strange. And she likes butts and zombies so we’re essentially the same person.

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14. Do you easily accept compliments? Or do you hate compliments?

I enjoy compliments from like a significant other type-of-person because I feel like I depend on affirmation haha. But it makes me really awkward to receive compliments from people I’m not close with.

15. Is your favourite attribute about yourself physical or non-physical?

Non-physical.

16. What is your favourite physical attribute about yourself?

My forearms. They’re covered in the cutest little freckles and I just love it.

17. What is your favourite non-physical attribute about yourself?

I’m very introspective and I think it’s allowed me to be a better friend, family member, girlfriend, etc.

18. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Of course.

19. Do you believe in soul mates?

A little bit less so lately, but ultimately, yes.

20. How seriously do you take horoscopes?

Far too seriously. My ex used to always make fun of me because I believe in magic and mermaids and all that stuff, and one time I read my horoscope on the bus and it said that my plans were going to get cancelled and I was bummed because I had plans to see a flick with two of my friends. So I ended up making it to the movies and we had just gotten our food and I told my friend how my horoscope said my plans would get cancelled so I was happy neither of them called to bail and we laughed, and we sit down in the theatre and I kid you not we just finished getting comfortable and the fire alarms went off in the building and we had to evacuate. So, I take them pretty seriously.

21. Have you ever been in love? How many times?

I think I’ve experienced love-like feelings 3 times. But my memories fade fast sadly, and so after I haven’t been dating someone for a while it’s hard for me to say if it really was love, because I so quickly forget how my feelings towards that person felt.

22. What makes you fall in love with someone?

Their mind. That’s super general, but I think I fall in love with people’s passions, the things they get excited to talk about, the parts of themselves they are the most proud of.

23. What does vulnerability mean to you? What has the ability to make you vulnerable?

I think vulnerability is just being honest. Providing someone with an unfiltered version of yourself. As soon as someone starts talking about their relationship with their parents I get weepy and that’s probably the quickest path to making me vulnerable.

24. What’s one thing you’re scared to ask a man, but really want to?

I don’t really think I’m scared per se, but I would like to ask men in general why the fuck they suck so much. Honestly, I’m horrendously disappointed in the male species. I think I’ve come off as an angry feminist a lot in this post, it’s actually just because my love-life sucks and I’m bitter haha.

25. If you were a man for a day, what would be the first thing you would do?

I’d apologize to my mother, for having grown me inside of her for 10 months, only for me to exit her womb with more rights than her.

26. What do you find most attractive about each sex?

I like men’s shoulders. There’s something about freckled shoulders that make me just want to snuggle up to them and smother them with kisses. I feel like that’s a super odd thing to say, but it’s a bit of a weakness of mine.

I find women’s eyes really intriguing. I think because women tend to wear make up more and can accentuate their eyes as well.

27. What’s one thing you’d love to learn more about?

I’d love to learn more about nutrition. Mainly because I honestly think I’m malnourished. I have such a horrid diet it’s actually awful. I’m a vegetarian but an absolute shit one. Sometimes I think I should start eating meat again but then I remember the only meat I really liked purchasing was beef jerky and hot dogs so then I decide not to. But ya, I’d really like to learn more about nutrition, having a balanced diet, etc.

28. What is something you’ve never done that you’ve always wanted to?

I’ve always wanted to drive a motorcycle.

29. Why haven’t you done it?

Well I don’t have my motorcycle license. But! I think I may get it in the spring! So it’s a work in progress.

30. If money didn’t matter, what would your dream job be?

A midwife. Which is what I’m on my path to now. So we’ll see.

31. If you had off from work today, what would you do?

Well, I only worked til 6pm today and I spent the rest of my evening blogging and watching youtube videos, so probably something similar to that.

32. What was the last thing to make you cry?

It makes me angry that I even have to say this, but it was a boy. I was re-reading past messages I had received from him like a sad melodramatic teen in a rom-com and I had myself a little cry. But then I wiped my tears and told myself that he’s a sociopath and I moved on with my life.

33. What was the last thing to make you laugh?

Oh my god. This thing on twitter.

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34. What is your favourite memory?

I don’t think it’s happened yet.

35. What’s the last thing that really embarrassed you?

Honestly, probably something that happened the last time I was drunk. I can’t tell you exactly what it was, but I know that’s when I tend to embarrass myself. I’m a very touchy, honest drunk and I know I get myself in some predicaments. So probably sometime then.

36. What is your biggest fear?

That I am infertile. I know it seems like a silly thing, but I’ve dreamt of being a mother for so long, it would absolutely crush me.

37. Do you have any regrets? What’s your biggest one?

I have three regrets in my life time.

The first, is that when I was at the Eiffel Tower in Paris, a boy approached me and I swear to you he was a vision sent by the universe straight from my subconscious. He was my dream boy. He smiled at me and I genuinely looked behind me to see if there was anyone there because he was far too put together and handsome to be looking my way. He ended up approaching me and chatting for a while and I never got his name and I’ve regretted it ever since.

Secondly, is that I didn’t allow my mum and her late partner to have more time together. I was an incredibly selfish pre-teen and I think because my dad was quite neglectful I didn’t want my mother’s time to be on other people as well. I know I gave her a hard time over how much time she spent with him, but looking back, I wish I would have encouraged her to enjoy herself more. It’s nothing I can take back, but if I could, I would.

Thirdly, is that I filled myself with so much destructive self-hatred in my teen years, that honestly up until recently had really effected my self-esteem. I was a super confident youngster, but like I said, I greatly depend on the opinion of others and when people in high school made fun of my boobs and things like that, it made me incredibly self-conscious. I just wish I could go back in time and shake myself and say “Katie, you are perfect just the way you are, don’t listen to anyone.”

38. Have you ever broken a law? If you haven’t, what is one law you’d love to break?

I mean, I j-walk every day.

39. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

I went bungee jumping once, that was fun. I also backpacked by myself for 5 weeks in Europe. It’s a fairly safe place to go I think but some people questioned my decision.

40. Would you have a conversation with a stranger?

Ya of course, I literally talk to strangers all the time. (Sorry mum, clearly I didn’t learn the most basic rules from childhood – although the public chatter gene does seem to be hereditary).

41. Would you tell a stranger that have toilet paper hanging from their shoe? Or their dress is tucked into their underwear? (Or anything else that is embarrassing to be seen in public)?

I mean, of course. Just last week I was on the bus and this man’s fly was down and really open, but I think he thought I was checking him out and he gave me a weird look so I just thought to myself “fine, let the jerk walk around with his fly down”. But if he hadn’t given me the low brow, I would have told him to spare him any further embarrassment.

42. What’s your favourite joke?

Oh gosh, I don’t really think I have one.

43. Are you a dog person or a cat person?

If my instagram is any indication, I’m a cat person. I talk about and photograph my cat Posie far, far too much.

44. If you could be any animal, what animal would you be?

A cat I think. Just because you literally spend your whole day napping, you don’t give a shit about anyone and you still have the whole internet going crazy over your kind. It’s sort of magical if you think about it.

45. What’s one show, movie, or book, you’re embarrassed to admit you enjoy?

I really enjoy adult cartoons. My favourites are Rick & Morty, Bob’s Burgers, Bo Jack Horseman, Young Justice and South Park. I usually don’t tell people.

46. How do you think your parents would describe you as a child?

That’s a good question. Selfish-af? Not really problematic? I think generally ok haha.

47. If you could go back to any age or time of your life, what age or time would that be?

I would go back to when I was 14 years old. I would hug my poppa, Doc, and my grandma. Basically just soak up time with all my favourite people who were taken from me too soon. I would tell them all I love them and create more memories with them then I have now.

I would also tell myself to learn to love myself before letting anyone else love me. I think that’s important too.

48. What’s something you believe in that not everyone else does?

Equality. This was just meant to be a sassy answer, but I’m also not really joking, yikes.

49. What’s one thing you would say that makes you unique from other people?

I don’t really know if I’m capable of a unique thought. There isn’t anything about me that is inherently unique.

50. What’s one thing you feel your life is missing?

Family. I have no family in the city I’m living in and I honestly miss it constantly. I also can’t wait to have a family of my own. I yearn for family in many different ways haha.


I hope you enjoyed these 50 questions/answers. I know some of my answers are probably a little bizarre, but I started this post at 8:30pm and it is now 1:50am so my answers have gotten a little bit more obscure the further I dived into the dark hole that is youtube. I watched a lot of Graham Norton clips. I hope you all had a lovely weekend, until next time…

Love always,
Kate

Camera Gear

Hello Folks,

I just wanted to write a quick post on all the camera gear I use. I don’t post much of my photography on my blog, but I do tend to include photographs in travel posts so incase anyone is ever curious what I shoot with.


Cameras

1. Canon EOS 70D

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2. Ricoh KR-5

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3. Polaroid 600 Red Stripe

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4. Fujifilm Instax Mini 8

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Lenses

1. Canon EF 75-300mm f/4-5.6

2. Canon EF 50mm f/1.8

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Love always,
Kate

The Liebster Award

Hello Folks,

While search through statistics on my blog, I had noticed that a few of the views on my account came from a different blog. I decided to check out why people were coming from their blog to mine and I realized they mentioned me in a post! The lovely Lynn from Sweater Giraffe Travels nominated me for the Liebster Award, so I thought I’d continue on the post.

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The rules of the Liebster Award are as follows:
1) Thank the blogger who nominated you and link to their blog.
2) Display the award graphic on your blog.
3) Answer the eleven questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.
4) Nominate five to eleven bloggers and post eleven questions for your nominees.
5)  Publish the full post on your blog.
6) And finally, notify your nominees by posting on their blog.


Lynn’s Questions

1) What’s the best thing you’ve eaten abroad?

Ok, Madie may remember because I feel like I bring up this dish a lot. But we were at this random restaurant in China, I don’t even remember the city. We were at these massive round tables with giant lazy-susans in the middle that had a bunch of different dishes on them. This one dish was tofu cut into little squares, and they were super soft and squishy. They were kind of spicy? And I just remember thinking it was the most amazing thing I’ve ever eaten. I love tofu now (I’m a vegetarian now and I wasn’t at the time), so I feel like it was kind of my introduction to good tofu haha.

2) What’s your go-to for travel inspiration?

I love looking at fellow bloggers for travel inspiration. A few of my favourites on instagram are: @helloemilie, @gypsea_lust, @doyoutravel, @amberfillerup

3) The most interesting person you’ve met while traveling?

When I was traveling alone in Europe, I frequently ate alone. I was at the Elephant House cafe in Edinburg, Scotland eating at this sad large circular table where the wait staff were putting all the lone travellers. The man across from me looked about in his 50’s-60’s and was writing in a book with papers scattered all around him. I was eating soup and avoiding my water that had dirt flakes in it (I assumed they did this on purpose because a lot of Europe does not like serving you water) and writing in my travel journal. The man complimented my journal and the fact that I was documenting my travels in that way. We ended up talking for the rest of the meal. He was a Scottish man, living in Boston, USA and was back for the 20 year reunion of his University in Edinburgh. He was apart of a Scottish folk band in Boston and I kept thinking he looked like Uncle Monty from A Series of Unfortunate Events the movie. I learnt that he was never married and had no children. He ended up offering me dessert and at the end of the meal paid for my entire tab. Oh, and part way through he noticed my aversion to my water and when I told him shyly about the dirt flakes he looked at it and winced, and ordered “two clean waters” the next time the wait staff came. They may have looked down on a 20-year-old girl with messy hair and mismatched clothes, but they respected a posh man with grey hair and I ended up getting the clean water.

Note: Billy Connolly, the actor from Series of Unfortunate Events also moved to Boston and joined a Scottish Folk band, just saying.

4) Your favourite cheesy road trip sing-along song?

I can’t say I really have a specific “cheesy” road trip. My favourite artist to listen to on the road is Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. Some favourites of theirs are “40 Day Dream”, “Janglin”, “”Man on Fire”and “Home”. They’re just a fun band to belt out to and let yourself get lost in.

5) When you started blogging, what were your goals?

I don’t think I really had any haha. I just started blogging as a way to get my thoughts out, kind of like an online diary. I didn’t ever think anyone would read it. I just had fun putting it together and writing little posts.

6) How have those goals changed over time?

I’ve definitely written posts that are less about me and maybe things that apply more to others. A lot of my posts are still very (*cough* egotistic *cough*) much about my life, but  I have definitely branched out what I choose to write about. I guess my goals have just changed from being a diary to something people can relate to more.

7) What’s your favourite way to blog? [Videos, written, photojournal, etc.]

I’d say just written. My blog posts are normally equivalent to word vomit haha. When I’m specifically blogging about traveling I like to include photos, as a big part of traveling for me is capturing moments.

8) What’s one time you’ve gone off the beaten path?

While in Switzerland I let myself get lost a lot. Whether it was in my own town or while I was visiting others. I’d just wander through the streets, down back alleys and into the furthest corners of the city. I never really had a plan of where I was going, I’d just start walking and stop when I found something worth stopping for. I think I’ve carried over this perspective into a lot of my future travels, the idea of getting lost.

9) What’s the next place you plan on traveling to?

I think I’d really like to go to India, or maybe back pack a load in South America. Both are pretty big trips in comparison to anything I’ve done before so it would take a lot more preparation, so we’ll see!

10) What’s the first trip you remember taking?

I travelled quite a bit with my parents when I was little. The first trip I actually remember taking was to Mexico with my family when I was about 14 (?) not sure if that is the actual age.

11) Do you have any secret budget travel tips to share with the world?

Literally none at all. The reason I probably don’t travel more is how horrible I am at finances and budgeting haha. In high school all the spare change, birthday money, etc. went to travelling. I went to China and Switzerland while in highschool, which were both pretty expensive trips for a 16-year-old’s income haha. But basically, my motto is just spend all your money on traveling to the point of bankruptcy (probably not the best advice).


Nominated: I don’t know any one who may particularly like to do this, but if you want to do it, post this to your blog and say that I nominated you hah!

Love always,
Kate

Drafts on Drafts (#2)

Hello Folks,

I’ve had a really hard time writing lately. Any time I come to discuss a topic or my feelings I begin and get about half way through a post before I quit writing, click the ‘save’ button and exit my browser. It reminded me of a blog post I wrote just under a year ago where I discussed the fact that I had 18 drafts just lying in some blogosphere waste land. Well, today I currently have 49. In under a year I have some how managed to muster up 31 more drafts. So, in the name of resurrecting lost posts, I’d like to do a ‘drafts on drafts’ 2.0.


Little Life Update: Life Is Messy, 06/03/2017

It’s been a while since I’ve wrote anything and I started feeling guilty about it. I write much better when I’m upset and creating when I’m happy has been proving to be more difficult than I thought.


To, 10/02/2017

Dear Depressed Me,


A Letter To My Little Sister (And Others Leaving High School to Pursue Post Secondary), 03/02/2017

Hello Little Sis,

As you know, I’ve felt an over whelming amount of love towards school since going back to Carleton and entering the Women and Gender Studies program. I know you’re considering post-secondary and a lot of your friends are too


Just Kate, 30/01/2017

Hello Folks,

I’m currently procrastinating studying for a test I have tomorrow so after checking twitter, instagram, snapchat, the works, I landed on my blog. The last hope for my procrastination.


Little Life Update: Self Love, 17/01/2017

Hello Folks,

I wanted to blab a little bit about my what I call “self love”.

I’ve spent my whole life re-evaluating and readjusting how I saw myself. As a child, I remember having no opinion. My hair was long and stringy, my mother often dressed me in fun outfits that I sometimes deemed questionable, but wore regardless, because how I dressed ultimately didn’t matter to me.


What It’s Actually Like Removing A Toxic Person From Your Life, 11/01/2017

Hi Folks,

I spent most of my life believing that you must make compromises with the company that surround your life. That if people treat you badly, don’t respect you, or generally lower the quality of your life that you must put up with their actions and short comings because they are in your life for a reason.


Surviving, Thriving and Everything In-between, 04/12/2016

Hello Folks,

I’ve spent a lot of today thinking about the word sonder. Sonder; n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.


A Letter To The People Stuck Between High School and So-Called Adulthood, 26/10/2016

Hello there,

I know that right now is a really tough time. You’ve finished high school, maybe you’re working trying to figure out your next move, maybe you’re in post-secondary and questioning every day if you’ve made the right choice, or maybe you’ve already graduated and feel like you’re floating between school and “real life”. I am here to tell you that it’s going to be ok. I’ll even go on step further and tell you why.


Mindless Living, 02/10/2016

Hello Folks,

Do you ever find you’re living your life in something that almost resembles a trance? Like you’ve gotten so sucked into a routine that you don’t even really know if you’re trying anymore?


Figuring Stuff Out, 07/09/2016

Hello Folks,

I think I’m a very introspective person, perhaps too much so. I’m constantly evaluating my own mental and emotional processes, trying to stumble upon some clue that may lead me to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing here.


Taking Chances, 07/09/2016

Hello Folks,

I read something on the internet the other day that I haven’t been able to get out of my mind. It said:

“1. Make a list of things that make you happy
2. Make a list of the things you do every day
3. Compare the lists
4. Adjust accordingly”

I don’t know why this struck me so much, but I haven’t been able to shake it. From reading my blog, it’s pretty apparent I’m not happy where I am. A lot of days (like today) feel wasted over pent up frustration about my job and going no where.


Knowing When Is Enough, 24/09/2016

Hello Folks,

Today marks one horrid year since I returned to my fast food job. Last April I said my goodbyes and quit for what I thought would be forever.


Anyways, I just find it interesting to look back on the posts I started and never finished. I always wonder why I didn’t continue them. If I got bored, if I was unsatisfied with the way the post was turning out, etc. No matter the reason, it’s always interesting to go back and breathe some life back into old posts.

Love always,
Kate